News Flashes
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News Flashes |
When asked for its thoughts after experiencing a virtchumentary on the Reality Intertextualization Project, the Meistersinger ambassador/representative, Srrreees'sri'scnnneeekk! (approx. translation) responded by stating that the Project was, 'quite interesting. But I would advise you to be most careful. You might not like everything you find in the High Spaces.'
When pressed for further explanation, the representative demurred, saying that it was sure that terragens civilization would manage just fine and that it would hate to spoil our fun when most likely nothing really serious would happen anyway.
SINGERS COMMENT ONLY LATEST OF MANY! WHAT DO THESE BEINGS REALLY KNOW?
This latest statement from our far-traveling visitors is but the most recent of the strange, mysterious and somewhat disturbing pronouncements they are so fond of. Perhaps the most famous of these was made by then representative Rrriiii'kkkj'jjjjkkk (approx. translation. Shortly after having established cultural relations with the terragens contact fleet, its first response on learning of the Wormhole Nexus, the greatest engineering achievement in the history of mindkind, was 'How cute!'.
This node demands to know: What do the Singers REALLY know and how do they know it!?
During today's exhibition of pre-singularity antiques at the Herlam Museum of Higher Art and Finance, a nanoswarm occurred. As a group of tourists were shown around, the guide demonstrated the features of an early information-era satellite retrieved from interplanetary space. As ve did so, a nanoinfestation emerged from a previously undetected pocket in the paint and caused a limited outbreak of the infamous Zelluloze Bulldozer. Museum nanodefenses immediately activated and could contain the infestation within minutes, but the exhibition had to be evacuated for several hours. Museum officials commented that there were no danger to the visitors and just another example of how history is full of surprises.
Today, on Ser Geshik, PI, Geshik deals with a subcritical nanoswarm which is stealing 1% of the biogenetic energy of its hosts to power its replication. Things start to get tight when it runs out of hosts in the hab, and starts to exponentially multi-host within Fra Geshik. . . Tune in for more...
There was an incident today with the Terran Federation's ambassador to the Keterist Spinwards Societies. The ambassador was observed to sneeze in a public function. Automatic sampling devices returned non-critical results, but the ever-astute ailect ObserverOfAll detected chaotic effects in the sampling devices. Further analysis found that there was a sub-efficient nanoswarm in the ejecta which apparently had memetic conditioning purposes. The ambassador denies any wrongdoing, instead blaming Keterist body odors for eir sneeze.
It is our sad duty to inform that due to the current situation in the Caligiri Union, the Schmidt-Maestasis stargate is inactive for an indefinite time. The instability caused by the transcension event has forced us to limit the bandwidth across the stargate to maintenance levels, and travelers or information will not be accepted. We apologize for the inconvenience and hope your stay at Haik Orbital will be a pleasant one.
We wish to point out that while the Unified Sentinentarian Code does support disaster refugee status to individuals and organisations wishing to leave the Caligiri Union, paragraph 5.3 does not imply an obligation on Schmidt-Maestasis or the Haik Demarchy to allow entry; see paragraph 7.4, "Technic Infestations", and 7.5, "Hegemonic Swarms". Situation updates are being sent to Macyma, Los Verdes and the STC Emergency Group continuously.
Have a nice day.
"Today, in Cafe 313, Geodolph Hertzinger was arrested on a charge of manslaughter after sneezing his fork through Frankinne Demond. The incident occurred partway through the accused's meatloaf course when the pepper accumulation in his sinus built up to an intolerable level, triggering the sneeze. 'If only you goo-breathers would remember your training,' the arresting deputy was heard to comment ..."
The underground auction of Orkadian stone-state bodies in Caveat Emptor habitat was closed by authorities today when it was revealed that the purported bodies were nothing more than calcium carbonate nanogoo sculpted into appropriate forms. The noted collector of falsities, GrimHumor VIV, immediately put a sealed bid in on the entire lot
10474, Daffy (Negentropy Alliance) - Today, with much fanfare, Dr Gurumba Schmidd retires from public service, the last instructor known to be actively practising on the Known Net. Eir lack of replacement is blamed on the ever-growing distribution of omniuploads covering technology comprehension of the best minds in the business at any given toposophic level. Thus, the role of the teacher has degenerated to no more than a sentient or subsentient facilitating the access of an untrained mind to the omniuploads needed and/or desired.
The Dergderph Incident - The Keterist ban on Madvert Ascension, and one biont's response...
