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Proof-reading EG - Printable Version

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RE: Proof-reading EG - selden - 03-22-2017

http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-topic/45bc148c97563
Civilized Galaxy - Sephirotic Empires

Hazard Rating: Ysually 0.0 to 1.0;
should be
Hazard Rating: Usually 0.0 to 1.0;


RE: Proof-reading EG - stevebowers - 03-22-2017

Godstars -Fixed
Enigma Cluster - Fixed
W-Brain -Fixed
Da'at Disaster-Fixed
Sephirotic Empires -Fixed
Thanks!

and a new image added to Godstars
[Image: godstar1490128011.jpg]


RE: Proof-reading EG - selden - 03-22-2017

Looks great!

It seems to me that the articles
http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-article/46f96750760b3
Godstar

and http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-article/462d9a409a10b
S-Brain, Godstar

should be merged. The former obviously is dated and could have its English usage improved substantially.


RE: Proof-reading EG - stevebowers - 03-22-2017

Ah! I wondered what had happened to Bernd's image.

Yes- they should be merged - I'll have a go at that in a day or two.


RE: Proof-reading EG - Rynn - 03-22-2017

What are the spikes supposed to be? The god star article is old and could do with an update. I interpret one as being a star with a truly massive quantity of magmatter infrastructure to the point that a significant fraction of it operates as a plasma processor. Thus the star who led be intensely active, pumping out vastly more energy than a normal star and probably constantly balanced on the point where anymore energy would cause it to come apart.

Thus a god star would be bright, hot, large and relatively short lived.


RE: Proof-reading EG - stevebowers - 03-22-2017

I'll add a link to Anders' paper on the subject as well.
http://www.jetpress.org/volume5/Brains2.pdf


RE: Proof-reading EG - selden - 03-22-2017

http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-article/4d483241428ad
Nuisances

in the direction the inner sphere, The expansion of the
should be
in the direction the inner sphere, the expansion of the

the Oracle War extending as far as the Disarchy).
should be
the Oracle War extending as far as the Disarchy.


RE: Proof-reading EG - selden - 03-22-2017

http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-article/4d34d395d27cf
Great Ecologist

the Great Ecologist has become arisen since the Preservers
should be
the Great Ecologist developed as the Preservers


RE: Proof-reading EG - selden - 03-22-2017

http://www.orionsarm.com/eg-article/464ba71b5823e
Disarchy

NoCoZo-Negentropy Alliance border was a complicated and infected issue
although amusing, probably would be better as
NoCoZo-Negentropy Alliance border was a complicated and fractious issue

TrueModel factions succeeded from the alliance
should be
TrueModel factions seceded from the alliance


RE: Proof-reading EG - stevebowers - 03-22-2017

(03-22-2017, 07:10 AM)Rynn Wrote: What are the spikes supposed to be?

This is just one possible configuration for a godstar. The blue sphere is a dynamically supported magmatter shell, one of many, containing layer after layer of plasma processors. The spikes are magmatter space fountains, dragging waste heat out of the interior and radiating it to space (where it can, if desired, be captured by a series of normal matter matrioshka shells). By increasing the surface area you can reduce the wavelength of emission to something slightly less damaging.